22) Cami 21) Moving In
Welcome new face, to my space, I have something for you.
Your eyes tell me you'd find delight in this refreshing brew.
Take a seat and rest your feet and put your baggage down.
You've found your way, I hope you'll stay. Stick around.
How much should I fill your glass? You've got to let me know.
I don't want to pour too much and make it overflow.
I've learned though not to pour too fast, no one wants a mess.
Sometimes it's best to guess more is often less.
Now take your glass into the air, but before you drink.
Take this time to clear your mind and ponder what you think.
Is there a feeling you would like to share?
I have a feeling my heart would love to care.
This is a feeling, and I am well aware
It could be fleeting but drink me if you dare.
If you decide you'd like to try and let me quench your thirst.
Raise your glass to your lips and let the liquid burst.
The first taste might be startling, not quite what you had thought,
but savor this new flavor, a little might be a lot.
Some folks aren't ready for what often happens next.
Their minds begin to race around and wonder what to expect.
’What do your want?’ I'll ask them, ‘It's really up to you.
’You can stay and chat and drink this refreshing brew.
’All I ask is respect the glass. It's fragile and might break.
’Then cut and hurt and make me cry and fill another lake.’
So let me know how it tastes, and make sure you’re clear,
Tell a friend or come again. I am always here.
Malcolm Mohil
"My Place"
Malcolm began to look at the love he had a bit differently after his jealous and envious crisis with Becky and Bruce. When he realized why what she did wasn't a big deal and therefore he should let go of the misery it caused him, he began to open up. He began to look at his relationships with other people in a different way. He wanted them to be more fulfilling.
He still had tremendous love for Becky. That would never change. In fact, it was the love he felt for her that was a catalyst for the love he was beginning to feel grow for others. As a result, he was happier, he was more at peace and he continued to gain understanding of himself.
Everyone he saw sparked a feeling of love in him. He knew he felt this love because it was his soul's way of telling him he could learn something from that person if he opened himself up and connected with that person. Thus, he felt encouraged to meet more people.
At first, he was basing his attractions on physical appearance. This was because his body produced hormones that made him feel sexually attracted to another and that felt good. He would approach pretty girls, introduce himself and start up a conversation. His confidence often paid off. If she was willing to open up, they would talk about meaningful things like their life situations, dreams they had or views about the world. They shared with each other their thoughts, from the mundane to the intimate.
Oten he’d feel sexual attraction and if the feelings were mutual, he wasn't hesitant to show affection to his new friend. He was extremely concerned about sexually transmitted diseases and of hurting Becky, so he never took the physical expression too far. They might sit close together or he might give a back rub and the occasional kiss, depending on the situation. He was always honest about what he was doing, never wanting to deceive anybody.
Becky knew what was happening. At first she was jealous and wanted Malcolm to stop befriending girls he wanted to kiss. He agreed to not focus just on girls, so he turned his attention to anybody who sparked a feeling of love in him. He discovered love could blossom with anybody if given the opportunity. He found love really wasn't just sexual attraction, but mental and spiritual attraction as well. In fact, the mental and spiritual attractions became more meaningful for Malcolm and were what he used to gauge his connection with other people. Those attractions reinforced the sexual attractions he might feel for that person.
Becky also met new people and engaged in similar relationships as Malcolm was. Malcolm and Becky agreed to always be honest with each other, to not have a complete sexual relationship with another person and to continue to be best lovers towards each other. They had an unusual relationship together, but one that seemed healthy, normal and almost necessary.
Malcolm met old people, young people, both guys and girls, all types of backgrounds, different religions, ethnicities, and political views, anybody who was open to befriending him. Sometimes the people were too far out, even for Malcom. Sometimes he met people who knew Becky. Sometimes things got physically intimate, but mostly it was hearty conversation discussing things of interest and inspiration.
Becky was doing the same, thus they both were growing individually and together. They would share stories and things they learned with each other. Occasionally, one would feel jealous when the other was talking about someone they met, but they trusted each other to make the best decisions. They were confident everything would work out the way it was supposed to.
One day, Malcolm was in the library reading a book about the Mayans when a beautiful woman 10 years older sat next to him. He looked up to see who it was and the minute he saw her face, he felt incredibly attracted towards her. She smiled at him, making him feel even warmer.
"I couldn't help notice the book you’re reading. That's one of my favorites. In fact, I came to the library to check it out again. What do you think, so far?" she asked him confidently.
"It's funny, because I just found this book sitting here on the table. It caught my eye so I decided to look through it. I don't know much about the Mayan's, so it's been pretty informative and very interesting, though I haven't read too much yet."
"Well, I don't want to take it away from you. I think you should finish it. I can check it out another time. Maybe you'd like to discuss it when you're through, if you decide to read the whole thing."
"That would be great! I love talking about things like this. Should I try to get a hold of you when I'm done?"
"Definitely. My name's Cami," she said as she reached out her hand to shake his.
"My name's Malcolm."
She wrote down her phone number and passed it to him. Malcolm smiled as he took it and placed it in his pocket.
"Well, I'll let you get back to your reading. Enjoy," she said and turned around to leave.
Malcolm hesitated, then got the courage to ask her, "Do you have any dinner plans tonight?"
"I do now! Where would like to eat?"
Malcolm and Cami left the library to chew on some food at a nearby Thai restaurant. Cami fascinated Malcolm. She was very out going, intelligent and philosophical. In fact, her philosophy was very similar to Malcolm's. She had learned over the years what love meant to her and realized it was a beautiful feeling to share with others. She decided to only love. She was doing what Malcolm and Becky were doing: meeting people, sharing with them, and growing as a result. This was why she stopped to talk with Malcolm. In fact, she placed the book on the table at the library to lure someone like Malcom.
"A couple of years ago, I read that Mayan book you were reading. For some reason I found it and it absorbed me. I was going through an interesting time in my life. I recently had my heart broken and was trying to discover what this thing we call ‘love' is. Anyways, I read one of the chapters in it and all of a sudden, I knew. It was so weird. The author was talking about the Mayan's relationship with God. The way he explained it made so much sense: we are God because God is love. We are love because we are God. I knew at that point why we love. To discover what love is. All of a sudden, my perception of life changed. I opened up because I knew the only way to really be happy is to be loving. So, I'm meeting people, developing relationships, sharing myself, growing and discovering who I am. It’s been so awesome!"
Malcolm was dumbfounded when he heard this. He knew his particular beliefs weren't original, but he never had met somebody who embodied them so fully. He immediately fell in love with Cami.
Likewise, Cami was very taken by Malcolm. She could tell he had a revelation about love and she wanted to get to know him so she could add to her insight. With their two open hearts, they began to forge a very close relationship.
Malcolm and Cami spent a lot of time together over the following two weeks. Becky knew about it and was jealous, but knew she couldn't stop them from being friends. She trusted Malcolm to do what was best. Malcolm was sensitive to Becky, but in his excitement for Cami there were moments when he unconsciously neglected Becky.
One evening, Cami invited Malcolm over for dinner. She had a special surprise lined up for him. She wanted to show him just how powerful their minds could be.
Malcolm arrived with a bottle of merlot. He opened it, poured a glass for them and sat down on her couch. He was excited to be at Cami's house and didn't try to hide it.
They had become close over the short time they knew each other and weren't shy in their affection for one another. It seemed normal and enhanced their connection. While they were talking, they sat close to each other, touching one another on the arm or leg, naturally as creature of the same species often do.
They talked about their lives, sharing what they thought was important or note-worthy. They ate a tasty dinner, savoring every bite. Finally, Cami announced her surprise for Malcolm.
"How would you like to test your mind power, Malcolm?" she asked him.
"Sounds great, what do you have in mind?"
"Well, I've been reading about experiments performed at Stanford Research Institute. They studied parapsychological activity, like people's ability to read minds. They discovered some people were able to determine another's thought. I thought, maybe you'd like to try."
"I know you did!" he teased.
"Then you're off to a good start. What I want to do with you is called 'remote viewing.' One of us will draw an object while the other concentrates on the one who's drawing until that person knows what's being drawn. Then, that person draws it on another piece of paper. Do you want to draw or mind read first."
"Draw."
Cami handed him a notebook and some colored pencils. "Draw anything you want, but concentrate on what you're drawing. Visualize it. Animate it. Become one with it. I'll blindfold my eyes, focus on your face, become one with you and know what it is you're drawing. Then I'll draw it in my notebook."
"OK. Sounds easy."
Malcolm began to draw while Cami faced away from Malcolm with her eyes blindfolded. He drew a sun, brilliant yellow with orange rays extending out from the sphere. When he finished, he imagined he was looking at the sun, feeling its heat and feeling reverence for this awesome ball.
Cami had an impression, so she drew it.
"All right, draw something else. Make sure you number each drawing. We'll do this three times before comparing drawings," Cami said.
Malcolm drew a tree and finally a beer mug. When Cami was done, she sat in front of Malcolm.
"What was your first drawing?"
Malcolm showed her the sun. Cami laughed and showed him what she drew, a basketball.
"Wow! That's pretty good! The shape and color are the same, at least," Malcolm said, impressed.
"Close, but not exact," she replied. "Next?"
Malcolm showed her the tree. Cami drew a mountain.
"You're getting the general shape at least," he said, then remembered, "When I was visualizing the tree, I was on a mountain. Maybe you picked up on that."
"Maybe, but I want one to be exact! Next."
Malcolm showed her the beer mug. Cami gasped and showed her a coffee mug.
"Woo hoo! A mugs a mug. Congratulations, Miss Master Mind!" Malcolm said, bending over to give her a kiss.
"I drew a fourth object, too. Do you want to see?" Cami said.
"A fourth object. Are you cheating?"
She showed him a sun, a beautiful golden sun with orange rays extending out.
"You drew that before!? My God, that’s amazing!" Malcolm said, feeling his heart and mind race towards this beautiful person sitting in front of him. He was so tempted to reach for her hands and place a passionate kiss on her lips. He almost did, when she interrupted his thoughts.
"OK, Malcolm Mind. It's your turn to know. Turn around and put this blindfold on. No peaking! I'll draw three objects, one at a time. Tell me when you finish each one so I can start on the next. Good luck!" she said. "Oh, and also..."
She leaned forward to kiss him on the lips. "That's to help remember me. Hopefully, it'll help you become one with me," she said, semi-seductively.
Malcolm was on fire. He wasn't sure he would be able to concentrate on anything but her. He took a few deep breaths as he prepared to know what she was drawing.
For her first drawing, she drew a cat. Her second was a flower and her third was a bird. Malcolm finished and turned around to face her.
"Are you ready to see how much you know?" she asked him.
"You know," he said teasingly. "You probably can read all my thoughts," he said nervously.
"I'd love to, but you'd probably overwhelm me."
She showed him the cat. Malcolm smiled and showed her a house.
"Maybe it's a house cat?" he joked.
She showed him the flower. He showed her a tomato.
"Maybe it's a tomato flower?" she joked back.
She showed him the bird. Malcolm's eyes grew wide. He showed her a feather.
"That's pretty good," she said. "I was focusing on the bird's feathers. I think you knew."
Malcolm was a little disappointed, even though he knew his feather was pretty close. He felt intimidated by Cami who obviously had a knack for reading minds. Cami sensed his disappointment, so she tried to cheer him up.
She leaned forward and gave him a kiss on his forehead.
"Don't expect to be able to know right away. It takes practice. I'm assuming you've never done this before. I have to be honest, I have. I've done this with about 10 different people, so I have a little more experience. The first time, I didn't get close at all. Your feather's a lot closer than any of my first drawings."
Malcolm felt better, though he was little jealous she’d done this before with other people. He knew it wasn't a big deal, though, so he let it go.
"Let's do it again," Malcolm said.
"I was hoping you'd say that! All the other people I did it with got bored after the first time. Most thought it was preposterous to think we could read minds. I knew you were different," she said and gave him a kiss on his lips.
Malcolm reached out his hands to hold onto hers. They gazed into each other’s eyes, looking for the soul that lived within. For several minutes they stared at one another.
Both were feeling incredible love grow inside. They used this feeling to power their minds, knowing the attraction they felt could be manifested in many ways. They wanted that energy to fuel their minds and creativity. They wanted that energy to pass the image of the drawing to one another through a psychic connection. They knew with this psychic connection developed by the love they were feeling, they would be able to know each other's thoughts.
"Let's do it!" Malcolm said, sensing they both were ready. He gave her a kiss and she turned around.
Malcolm drew while Cami knew. When they were done, she turned around to face him. They smiled at each other and shared drawings.
Malcolm showed her an eye. Cami showed her an eye.
"That was too obvious, Malcolm. Did you draw a heart next?"
He laughed and said, "I thought about it, but didn't."
He showed her a guitar. He showed her a shoe.
"Hmmm. Any connection there?" she asked.
Finally, he showed her a heart.
"You are too obvious!" she laughed out, showing him her heart.
They both were overcome with love, but kept calm. They kissed each other and began another round. Cami drew while Malcolm knew.
Cami showed him a bow tie. Malcolm showed her a necktie.
"That's good!" she said.
Cami showed him a musical note. Malcolm showed her a flute.
"That's good, too!" she said.
Cami showed him an outline of a naked woman, in the Goddess form. Malcolm showed her a baby.
"The Goddess and Creation. Beautiful, Mr. Master Mind."
He was in awe. Though the images themselves didn't look the same, the concepts behind them were close enough. The similarities reinforced his attraction to Cami. Maybe it was confirmation bias based on wishful thinking and was merely coincidence misinterpreted as psychic connection. All that mattered to Malcom was he believed there was something to this. He was glad he finally got to put his theories to the test, not realizing the love he expressed for Cami in his quest to express love would test his relationship with Becky.
"This is amazing. I've read about stuff like this before, but never tried it myself. I've been living in a land of theory and now I'm actually applying what I believe. Thank you for sharing your surprise with me," he said, feeling tears well up behind his eyes.
Cami sensed the emotion, crawled over to him and fell into his arms. They held each other tightly, letting the love grow and flow inside. Malcolm felt sexual aroused but didn't want to express his love to her that way, at least not yet. He wanted his connection with her to be spiritual. He knew the physical connection might strengthen that, but also knew if they were to have sex, Becky would be devastated.
He began to think of Becky and how much he loved her. That thought enhanced what he was feeling before, overwhelming him. He was loving two beautiful woman and it felt totally natural.
He knew if Becky were with another guy, doing what he was doing with Cami, he would be extremely upset. He knew, though, jealousy and anger were insecurities based on fear. He knew love was the only real feeling he wanted in his life, so he didn't care if this hurt Becky. He had compassion for her and didn't want her to feel upset, but he believed he needed to express his love or feel not whole, repressed and unholy. He hoped Becky would understand. He hoped Becky would be able to rise above being upset. He hoped Becky would realize what Malcolm was coming to truly believe: love should be encouraged to flow, fear should be allowed to go.
He looked into Cami's eyes and said, "I love you, beautiful Cami. You truly are a gift from God. Thank you for expanding my ability to love."
"I love you too, Malcolm. Believe me, it's my pleasure to know you and grow with you. I hope we're just beginning to feel what love can do."
They laid on the ground, holding each other, exchanging kisses and the thrill of being a human in love.